Five Years of Chatter

Five years (and two days) ago I nervously wrote this post and stuck my toe into the scary waters of the blogosphere for the very first time. I remember so many details from that bright summer Saturday afternoon.  I remember the way the heat of suns bright rays burst through the living room window while I sat with the heat of my laptop burning my legs.  I remember my in-laws had taken my then four and two year old on a trip so the house was quiet except for the low hum of the television Chad was watching in the living room.  I remember the way my hands shook and the loud pounding in my chest as my doubts and fears challenged the small part of me that wanted to be brave and write. I remember the way Chad encouraged me. . . just do it. 

So I wrote.  There was no map and no instructions.  I slowly and nervously began putting my fingers to the keyboard and I wrote.  Day in and day out I began to spill the contents of my heart and our life onto a blank blogger page and somehow, without noticing, I became stronger, truer, more who I am.

From our silly family moments to the heart wrenching bitter-sweetness of raising kids and from my marital discoveries (Chad’s Nothing Box) to grappling with the loss of my Mom, Running Chatter was my go-to for expression.  

In the very beginning I needed to tell my story.  I needed my insides to be cracked wide open and I needed to talk about my Mom.  I needed to express my grief and my sadness.  I needed to be honest and feel the pain of loss.  More than anything, I needed to throw away the shame that came with losing my Mom to such a horrible sickness.

Running Chatter helped me to do that.  Running Chatter helped me throw away the shame.

Writing in this space allowed me to let go of all that was hidden and embrace myself and my story in all it’s beauty and monotony.  Five years ago, on that hot summer afternoon, I could have never known all that would happen, in part, because of this space. Running Chatter opened my world up to new people and helped me reconnect with old friends.  Writing in the space helped me to begin dreaming new dreams.  How could I have ever known when I publicly begged Chad for my very first camera that I would one day have an entirely new career?  

In reality, though, I understand that Running Chatter is just a tiny space.  It’s a little corner of the web where words are streamed together, some days more fluidly than others.  It is not lost on me that Running Chatter was simply a vessel that opened my world up to people in a different way. Today, on Running Chatter’s Five Year (and two day) blogiversary, I want to say Thank you.

Thank you to those who have stopped in here from time to time.  Thank you for sticking with me through the ebbs and flows of our life.  Thank you for those who have encouraged, supported, accepted, loved, and embraced me and our family.  Thank you to those who have taught me and encouraged me with your own stories.  Thank you, friends, near and far, for visiting my small space and time and time again spurring me forward and helping me to dream.

Today, I celebrate Running Chatter’s five years with this 679th post and a great big virtual hug for each of you who have walked this journey with me.  From the bottom of my heart. . .

Cousin Visit. . .