One Step

“The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step.” -Lao Tzu

One tiny step. Not a big deal to many, but a huge deal to me.  That’s what I did just last night.  One tiny step.  My first step in 3 weeks and 3 days. 

In case you can’t tell. . . those crutches are just hovering above the floor. . . they are not on it.

I had been trying to take that step for three days and each time became frustrated to the point of tears at the pain and my inability to do it.  But finally, it happened. . . my very first step.  (Okay so maybe it was more like a shuffle, but this is my story.)

Anyway, I was so excited I ran (or shuffled) back to the kids bedrooms to show-off my accomplishment.  We had already put them to bed, but I thought this was a moment to celebrate.  I walked into Charlie’s room first and when he witnessed my steps without the crutches he exclaimed, “You’re walking!”  After a moment of watching me shuffle across his room a sweet smile spread across his face before he made his next observation. . .

“You sure walk slow.” 

Ah, the honesty of children.  He’s right, though.  I do walk slow, but it was something.  And as soon as I put one foot in front of the other, the runner in me felt a spark.  It was as if I could feel the breeze on my face and the cold air in my lungs.  I could see myself out on the road once again with sweat pouring down my face while lost on my thoughts.  That one step gave me the same feeling I used to get after a really great run. . . the feeling that I can do anything.

It’s going to be a long journey, I have no doubt.  I’m still quite dependent on the crutches and one must walk before they run, right?  But for now I am relishing in this accomplishment and finding hope in what lies ahead.  This needed to happen, though.  This injury and this surgery and this time off.   As much as I love running and the huge role it has played in my life, it wasn’t until now that I’ve been able to put it in perspective.  It was because of this time that I began to open my eyes and realize that there is a huge world out there just waiting to be experienced. 

So I am taking baby steps and beginning a long slow journey. . . but slow isn’t really a bad thing is it?  (I will have more on that later.)  For now, I’m celebrating step one of which I sure will be many, many more (and faster) steps.  And I am making a vow with myself to remember that running is just a part of me. . . not all of me.